deserved someone better and she is more likely forgotten in such natural fashion. never care no more.she committed herself to the other side. due to all my respect to her, i have giving up of waiting. she managed to erase me first.and so did i.
grateful that somebody else had come. at first i feel bad for a while but then i just smile. i go ahead and smile.
i witness how busy my batch striving with their studies.some of them might not. because they have some sort of ability to study in a short time to understand the concepts and so forth. there's where the jealousy comes in.well.
i dont mind much about that, but i do mind ppl "that have better than my results" expressing their said-to-be-worse-result (which likely equivalent to my results)..i told them mine, and they said "ok laa tu..aku nye teruk", and they tell theirs, which is far better than me, that is
SUPER OFFENSIVE.. TOTALLY RIDICULOUS.. INSULTING..
that sucks.very-the-mery-makan-strawberry-secret-recipe-mid-valley.(??) not to say that they are wrong or so to speak; sometimes they went too much for the future...sometimes for the current... again and again, this keep happening as the fall semester started last year.. i didn't see it so much for upperclassmen batch (they look so fine~and enjoy...even though they are busier than us)..
getting a 4.0 is useless without communication with local people around us, without learning things that are hidden besides theory stuffs that we learn and prove in the laboratories, and surely without the barakah from the Merciful and our parents. not to say i'm pious neither losing my faith towards my religion. sometimes i do forget what i suppose to do here.. to learn other stuffs that's not in the book, i have great great intuition for that but unfortunately, it seemed to be no one have the same interest as my friend do, the one in utp..i envy him sometimes.
it doesn't create a degree of happiness that satisfy my life as here., struggling for a degree of engineering.
i see the real world, it's not about books. it's not about LEARNING materials. it's not about STUDYING contents for hours. it's about applying "how-to-solve" in a such a fashion way people would be PLEASED to see..
and that ability is much likely hard to see, and to be found anymore.... feel complex? confused? complicated?.. it's meant to be.
first time celebrating with my friends..
first time celebrating outside of my country.
if not, i would have stayed at home, watching fireworks at klcc from my hometown.
2006.a great year for me.
dealt with a lot of transitions.
foundation.undergraduate.rise and fall.made up bestfriends.
and never-ending generating tolerance with people's behaviour.
i lost my life's catalyst in the middle of december.
and that's sucks thou.hurt me a lot.i'm not ready for that impact.
hard and yet, painful and confused.such deliberation made me mad for weeks.
i'm blinded.i'm lost in the hazy clouds of relationships.it's still not
clear to see where am i now on her side.the fact is i'm really not ready for this,n i gonna wait for the
return...
worth trip to new york city,many things i learnt
how desperate street people doing performances..to survive their life. how muslims are actually unharmed in the metropolis of new york. stuck at times square for the new york celebration, eventually ends up celebrating it at pavonia/newport, jersey city.
and i just love the picture that i took below, 86th floor of empire state building, omg, it's super beautiful new york city.
